The Path to Purity

I remember when celibacy became clear to me. It was July 4, 2015 and I was sitting in a living room full of girls. I had recently gotten saved and everything was new to me. The ladies were talking about their own vows of purity and how it had helped their life and I remember sitting thinking "I'm never giving up sex!" I thought this way because prior to me being saved, sex was a stronghold in my life. I had never gone an extended period of time without having sex. I ALWAYS "tried". I would tell myself "I'm not going to have sex with ... until we're in a relationship" (my personal favorite) or I would say "I'm going to wait 3 months before having sex with ...", I would try not to be alone with guys in compromising situations, I would try to not talk about sex but every "try" that I attempted to make failed. So because of that stronghold, being celibate never seemed possible to me until that night. As I rode home, I remember the Lord telling me that I would be celibate and nothing in me refused.

 The past 1.5 years of celibacy has had its ups and downs and I finally realized the reason why I could not abstain from sex when I was not saved. I needed the power of Jesus Christ to break the stronghold that I had within me. No matter how hard I tried in my own power to flee from sin, I was not strong enough and that's where Jesus stepped in to free me.

Purity does not mean abstaining from the physical act of sex alone. Purity is a process of sanctification, which is the process of becoming holy. We as Christians will go through the process of sanctification until our bodies are no longer on this earth, therefore we will forever be on the path to purity. Purity by definition is "freedom from anything that debases, contaminates and pollutes." What types of things can contaminate and pollute the mind? TV, music, movies, social media, friends and the list goes on. As Christians, we are not to be double minded as James 1:8 says, "Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do." Our thoughts should be pure and pleasing to God as Philippians 4:8 says, "Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right and pure and lovely and admirable." So not only should we flee from the physical act of sex but we also have to be intentional about keeping our thoughts pure.

I have struggled with this concept many times. I was pretty good at the no sex aspect, but keeping my thoughts pure in light of what I constantly fed myself via TV, music and social media proved to be much harder. I was a HUGE fan of How to Get Away with Murder but then I noticed that there was a sex scene in every episode that would then cause me to think about sex more often than not. I also noticed that if affected my sleep and I would have graphic sex dreams. I realized that there was a connection between the sex I exposed myself to and the dreams that I was having so I decided to cut that show out. Another show I decided to cut out was Being Mary Jane. I loved the fact that there was a black woman journalist on TV, BUT that was underscored by the graphic sex and lewd talk that took place. How could I possibly stand against sexual temptation when I was constantly feeding my thoughts sex and impure things? It was literally impossible to meditate on the things of God.

 I also chose to cut secular music out of my life. That has been a huge struggle but when I think about it, secular music does not promote the things of God so I cannot align myself with anything that is in direct contradiction to God and the Word. I had to unfollow a lot of people and pages from social media because of the content being posted as well. Many people may feel that this is extreme, but my goal is to become as much like Christ as I can and I know that actively working to keep a pure mind is the way to go. Every Christian may not need to cut out the same things that I did but I challenge you to take a look at you own life.  Are there areas in your life that are causing you to be contaminated or polluted by things that are not of God? If so, address those areas and remove anything that is not putting you on the path to purity.