My Identity

I've really wrestled with this topic ever since I've been saved. There was always a push and pull between my identity in Christ and my identity in my ethnicity IE. my African American roots. When I was full out passionate for one I felt like I was neglecting the other and vice versa. It was not until the last 6 months or so that I've been able to gain more wisdom and security in my identity which is in Christ. Before I was saved, I was full on Black Power! I was Vice President of the Black Student Union at Cleveland State University, I organized a protest there and I stayed in full defensive mode when it came to controversial matters regarding black people. (Honesty moment: I was not too fond of white people either.)

When I got saved, I pulled away from a lot of the activities that I participated in that centered around black history and activism because I had no idea how to intertwine both parts of my self and understand my identity. But once I began to know the Lord and read His Word, I began to see that He is my creator and my salvation so my identity belongs in Him and Him alone. He is the only one that is in control of everything. Without Him, no matter what my skin color is, there would be no me so how can I base my identity in anything else?  I still had trouble because I felt like I was neglecting my black-ness lol. Especially when I took a class called Black Psychology. That class was hard because they spoke about African religious traditions and I just could not bring myself to believe in them because they were contrary to what is written in the Bible. Internally I felt as though I was being a traitor to my race.

It was not until I went to  a conference in December 2015 that everything became really clear to me. I sat in on a panel that was about how to deal with the injustices that African Americans face across the country whether that be through police officials, mass incarceration and the justice system and much more. All of the speakers on the panel were black men except for one. They spoke the truth and they shared how they have experienced the same internal conflicts that I have. What I took away from that panel and from many sermons  and teachings from Pastor Kevin is that God made different ethnicities, this is true; but our ethnicities are what makes us unique in the BODY OF CHRIST. Once we are saved, we are brought into a new family of God's chosen priesthood. But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God.- 1 Peter 2:9-10 . This made me see that my family is no longer just my biological family, my close friends and only black people. My family includes ALL CHRISTIANS no matter what color they are. I am to love them as my own.

That idea at first was really hard to reconcile because I had built up such strong walls against people of other races. My identity stood firm in my skin color, That was what I let define me. I had to change that mindset, I had to let Christ work on my heart which is what He's been doing these last couple of months and will continue to do until the day I die. I know many black Christians especially young ones feel the same way I did especially since times are getting so much tougher for us in America. It's so easy to get angry and vilify another race but because we are a family, we as Christians can never ostracize and vilify an entire race or even individual people. We have to know that because our identity is in Christ and not our skin color we can be assured that there is always a higher power in control. When we rely on ourselves and put our identity in our ethnicity, we limit the power that can move and ultimately we believe that we have all the power alone when that is far from the truth. Nothing can be eradicated without Jesus Christ. No matter how hard we as black people try to stop a situation if we do not come together, put our hope, faith, trust and identity in Jesus Christ, nothing will change...

By me being better able to reconcile my identity and my ethnicity, I am able to still celebrate my "blackness", my Black Girl Magic, my chocolate skin, my history and culture without losing who my identity truly belongs to.